How Early is Too Early to Drink?

Most people tend to think that 8 is too early to be drinking, but I happen to think people should wait until they're 21. Whenever I see an 8-year-old drinking I look at them with pity and wonder how bad their life must suck for them to be drinking so early.

That being said, I don't think it matters what time of day they're drinking. Time is all relative anyway. If you work during the nights then clearly you're going to be drinking on an opposite shift than people who work days which means you're going to be seen stumbling around pissing on park bench at noon. The only reason society says you should wait till nighttime to drink is so that we don't see you urinating, defecating, and vomiting all over the place. It's a selfish rule that I choose not to live by.

Fact of the matter is, it's far safer to drink during the day because if you do somehow find yourself behind the wheel of a car (which I do not condone) it's much easier to see where you're going as opposed to driving in the dead of night. Drinking during the day saves lives. So the next time you walk into Wal-Mart naked with a half empty bottle of vodka, before you throw up into a shopping cart, you remember to tell people to go screw themselves because their rules don't apply to you, man.