Ask McFartnuggets: “Why Does Lightning Look Like Human Veins and Tree Branches?”

Dear McFartnuggets: 

Have you ever noticed that lightning looks the same exact way veins and tree branches do? I was smoking that dank last night and it hit me that if you see lightning it looks just like my grandmother’s leg. It’s all blue and each line branches out just like a tree branch or the veins in a tree leaf. Did god run out of designs or something? Why couldn’t he make tree branches look like curvy or make lightning look like big cubes? Why come they look the samesies? -- Iliana from Baltimore, Maryland

Dear Iliana:

I’ve noticed that too and I think it’s just the way nature works. When lightning strikes, it’s electrostatic discharge between a cloud and the ground. The static doesn’t come from a single point in space so it collects and then focuses the energy into a main strike. From that main strike, energy can be discharged and branched outwards. When a tree grows, it grows from a main trunk and the branches extend outwards to make sure the leaves reach as much sunlight as they can. In human beings, veins have to circulate blood through the entire body. In order to do that they have to branch out as well. It’s all a matter of physical efficiency. Branching out of energy is the cause and energy branches out because it’s trying to expand. Energy expands all throughout the universe, that’s what energy does and it’s no different in the sky or your grandmother’s leg.

Some parts of the brain look oddly like taints, vaginas, and buttholes.

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