Dumbass Sayings: “You’re Welcome”

The phrase “You’re welcome” is one of the most commonly said phrases in the English language. It’s something you probably say a few times every single day and it’s the natural companion to the phrase “Thank you.” But have you ever stopped to think about what it actually means? Just go ahead and say “You’re welcome” right now. What do you think that is supposed to mean? You are welcome? You are welcome to what? When someone answers “You’re welcome” after a “Thank you” what exactly are they trying to say? You’re welcome to be helped? That sounds weird. We just speak this Yoda shit and don’t even stop to question it. We have all this bullshit language infused in daily life mostly thanks to the concept of customer service. If someone says “Thank you for choosing McDonald’s” you don’t say “You’re welcome.” “You’re welcome” is supposed to be the natural response to “Thank you” but the fact is, it’s actually a nonsensical relic of English. The next time someone says “Thank you” instead of throwing a “You’re welcome” back at them, try just saying “Have a good day.” That serves the same purpose as “You’re welcome” except when taken in and of itself, it actually makes sense as something a human being would say to another human being.

"I'm welcome?"

Is Laughter Really The BEST Medicine?

Everyone knows the old saying "Laughter is the best medicine" and while laughter has been proven to help people heal and recover from pain, it isn't the BEST medicine. If laughter was the best medicine why doesn't my doctor prescribe me a video of a midget on a tricycle, or better yet bring a mime into the room and punch him in the nuts? Sometimes laughter isn't an effective medicine AT ALL, like in the case you have some sort of oral injury like lets say you accidentally bit too hard on a steel dildo and broke all your teeth. Laughter would be detrimental to recovery in that case. If you have gangrene in your leg then the best medicine would probably be more along the lines of morphine and a bonesaw. When you're on the operation table being put under, the last thing you want to hear is everyone in the room laughing hysterically. Laughter is not the BEST medicine. That is a misleading statement that needs to be revised for future use. I think a phrase like "Sometimes funny helps" would be more accurate.