5.27.2013

The First Booty Call Ever


If you were wondering where the phrase "Booty Call" originated, look no further than this 1960's Charmin toilet paper commercial that was subsequently torn off the air faster than you can say "Why is there blood on my toilet paper?!"

5.19.2013

Classic Old Commercials From The 20th Century


The 20th century was a trying, turbulent time for so many people. A lot happened: World War I, World War II, and most importantly television. Here's three commercials from the black and white era of TV that will help you understand what the 20th century was all about.

5.11.2013

2016 U.S. Presidential Candidate Binkie McFartnuggets


Yes, I have entered the 2016 Presidential campaign and for this reason I am releasing videos to help educate the public on where I stand on the issues. There are rough times ahead, but together working as a team we can rise to the top as one America.

5.07.2013

Very Scary Murderous Clown Commercial (Horrific)


If you wanted to know where Stephen King got his inspiration for Pennywise the Clown, look no further. Krinkles the Clown was one of the pioneers of horror along with Bozo and lead the world in causing children nightmares. The difference is, Bozo was a generally nice guy who just looked psychotic whereas Krinkles was a legitimate taker of lives and mortal souls.

5.05.2013

Things You Should NEVER Put Hot Sauce On

I put that on EVERYTHING!
People who really love hot sauce make some weird claims like "I put that on EVERYTHING!" But the fact of the matter is, it's impossible to soak the entire planet in hot sauce and even IF you somehow managed to pull that off, the rest of the universe is still a "thing" so that's an impossible statement. You do not put hot sauce on EVERYTHING and here's a quick list of things you don't and should never put hot sauce on:

5). Dogs. - There's simply no reason to put hot sauce on dogs, the flavor is already rich enough JUST KIDDING. You know why not to put hot sauce on dogs, ya crazy!

4). Genitals. - Some people may differ, but as a man who has had pepper spray on his face and nutsack I have to say it is horrible. The burning is excruciating and even after soaking in baby shampoo and milk for days you still have the blistering and peeling of skin to deal with.

3). Police Officers. - They don't like this. If you pour hot sauce of a police officer make sure to bring extra for the guys in your holding cell at the precinct.

2). Corpses. - This is just disrespectful. Contrary to popular belief, the open casket funeral is not open casket so you can apply hot sauce.

1). Babies.
- Babies and hot sauce do not mix. If you're one of these people who claims to put hot sauce on everything I sincerely hope you missed babies because that's bad news. If you're soaking babies in hot sauce you're wrong and I think deep down you know it. Please stop.