Great New Way To Help The Environment

If you're like me then you're always trying to find new ways to reduce your human strain on the environment. Just recently I discovered a great way to do this and it's something everyone can get involved in. If you're a person who is in the routine of taking one bowel movement every day (and for your sake I hope you are) start getting into the routine of pooping every other day instead. I discovered this by accident, but I soon realized that the human body really doesn't need to crap every day, you can skip a day. So far I'm fine. Why would you do such a thing? Think about all the toilet paper you'd be saving and all the water from flushing that wouldn't be used, and also the time that is saved by not straining out a crap.

Let me tell you something, if you're spending forty five minutes every day being patient with a turd because you think a human has to take a crap every single day to be "regular" then you need to cut that shit out literally and wait a day. By waiting those turds will be locked and loaded and ready to launch in mere minutes with very little downtime.

I wouldn't try to stretch it to holding in your poop two or more days, that could get dangerous as it is then legally considered constipation. Also this could negatively effect the conservation effort since you might end up needing to use more toilet paper in that one sitting than the amount you'd need for three separate moderate dumps. I feel like if everyone in the world could train their bodies to crap every other day the impact felt by this would be outstanding and perhaps enough to alter the entire course of Earth's history for the better. Please, do your part. Hold in your turd today and put it off till tomorrow.