The Top 3 Benefits To Having Same Sex Parents

With a lot of same-sex marriages happening lately, a huge concern is that the children brought into these families will grow up strange. Well while it may take a little more time to see how all that turns out I can bring up a few specific positives to having same-sex parents. There are very obvious benefits to having two mothers or two fathers and here are the top 3:

3. You only have to celebrate Father’s Day or Mother’s Day.

Whether you want to admit it or not, all these gift giving holidays get pretty annoying. Between Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, your mother's birthday, and your father’s birthday it’s amazing how there’s ever money left to buy drugs. Well, if you’ve got two moms or two dads you can pretty much just strike off one of those holidays on the calendar and let them share a gift. If your same-sex parents happen to be twins born on Christmas you just hit the fucking holiday convenience jackpot.

2. The question “Who do you love more: your mother or father?” is an easy one to answer.

One of the biggest questions in a person’s life can be the question “Do you love your mother or father more?” It’s just like the question “Which of your children do you love more?” It’s very difficult to answer, but it does have a definite answer. Well if you’ve got two moms or two dads, what could have been a tremendously uncomfortable dilemma becomes a comically easy question to answer.

And the number one benefit to having same sex parents is…

1. When you ask for something your parent can’t say “Go ask your mother.”

Traditionally speaking when you’re a kid and you want a new toy or something you ask your dad and he says “Go ask your mother…” This is usually because your father has no idea what’s going on with you. He figures the mother will know how to handle the situation and perhaps use the toy as a reward for good behavior. Well if you’ve got two fathers then obviously there isn’t a mother to ask and they can’t say “Go ask your dad” because the kid will be like “You are my dad…” The same thing would happen with two mothers. If one of the moms says “Go ask your mother” the kid will say “Who the hell do you think you are?” I’m not sure if there’s a comeback to that.

Look at Jesus being all creepy in the background.

Now I’m sure there are more benefits to having same sex parents, but these are the obvious and most beneficial ones. If you’re a kid with two parents of the same gender you should definitely take advantage of these positives and use them to help you ignore the few negatives when those do come up.