Would America have elected a President Blythe?

Apparently I've been sleeping in the cozy armpit of a cyclops for my whole life and the foul odors have had a psychotropic effect on me, but today I found out that Bill Clinton was born William Jefferson Blythe. Is this a well known fact? I feel like an alien right now. Is this one of those things that people assume everyone knows so no one ever talks about it? Like, yeah of course Elton John is gay, what the hell, you haven't gone to his Wikipedia page yet?

I've been a fan of 90's stand up comedy too, I can't remember any comic mentioning this. Did they? Of course it's not like Clinton changed his name specifically for his campaign, otherwise I'm sure President Obama would have considered a name change just to ensure victory... I wonder what names he would have considered.

I do remember a Dennis Miller joke in which he stated Clinton knew he wanted to be president when he was a teenager, then I read today that Clinton took his stepfather's name formally when he was fourteen, so maybe he did change his name to become president... That's kind of creepy eh? Then again, who am I to judge? He's a smart guy who knew what he was doing. Blythe vs Bush would have been a tough call. You already have a president with a last name starting with B, why go for an unproven commodity? But wait, C? Now that's the progression we need! Dole tried to cash in on that concept, but an initial can only take you so far.

Of course we all know now that people don't vote for presidents based entirely on name or race, but a bad name can disqualify you. Barack Obama is a damn cool name, had his name been Shifty Snatchfister, only God knows what would have happened to him.

-Binkie McFartnuggets

1 comment :

  1. i did not know that, and god only knows why Oboma was elected.

    nice work...