Dumbass Sayings: “Counting Stars”

The phrase “counting stars” has been seen in the title and/or lyrics of more than one song lately and all I can do is wonder what the hell that’s supposed to mean. Counting stars sounds like something a cartoon does when it gets hit over the head with a frying pan. Maybe counting stars is something you do when you’re stumbling around drunk on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. Or maybe this is referring to literally counting stars in the sky. I’ll save you some time if that’s the case, there are 100 billion stars in the Milky Way galaxy alone. Don’t bother counting all of them, that would take approximately 3,169 years and you’d have to keep counting nonstop. Why anyone would want to “count stars” makes no goddamn sense to me. You’re never going to get an exact count so why start something you mathematically can’t finish? Once you start counting it’s only a matter of how long you can go before giving up. There’s no MAYBE you’ll give up. You WILL give up. Counting stars is one of the most idiotic things a person can do and I have no idea why it’s in songs these days, but that must say a lot about the state of today’s popular music.

Yeah, good luck with that, dummy.

Dumbass Sayings: “I Don’t Know About You, But I’m Feeling Twenty-Two”

Taylor Swift has a song where she says “I don’t know about you, but I’m feeling twenty-two.” What the hell does feeling 22-years-old mean? There really is no particular feeling to being specific ages. You might be able to feel 20, 30, 40, etc., but you can’t feel 25 or 34. That’s getting very nuanced to the point of nonsense. The other problem I have with this is 22 is usually the time when a person is graduating from a 4 year college. This should be a great exciting time in a person’s life, but for thousands and thousands of young men and women it’s when they go out into the job market and struggle to find full-time jobs in their fields of study. In the last three years, more than half of new college graduates take jobs that don’t require a college degree, according to the Center for Economic and Policy Research. Only 27 percent of college grads have a job related to their major and 40% are considered underemployed or need more training. Not to mention you only get a 6 month grace period after graduation before you have to start repaying your student loans which are on average around $25,000 per borrower. Bottom line, it’s not a great time to actually be 22. It’s much better to feel any age before 22 when you basically have a free ride and no real responsibilities. It’s even better to feel 23 because you’ve got a better idea of what to do. Being 22 is actually awful, but it rhymes with “you” so that’s why she says it, which is bullshit. I think Taylor Swift's 22 probably feels a lot different than other people's. Maybe that's why she says "I don't know about you. She really has no idea what other people are going through out there.

I don't know about you, but I think I just poo'ed.