Ask McFartnuggets: “If I Slip a Woman a Female Viagra Can That Considered Rape?”

Dear McFartnuggets: 
With female Viagra about to be approved by the FDA it’s got me wondering… Let’s say I’m at a club and spitting game at a chick and she’s giving me the cold shoulder. What if then I slip a crushed up one of my grandma’s female Viagras in her drink to make her super horny and we end up going back to my van. Is that rape? I mean let’s say in this scenario the chick isn’t even drunk. Is that better or worse than boning a drunk chick? Because I’ve obviously done that with no legal problems before. - Vasili from Miami, Fl

Dear Vasili:

Yeeeeeeaaaaaahhhhh… Normally I ignore all the questions about rape that people send me, but this one is a little different. I think this conundrum is the exact reason female Viagra has had some trouble being approved in the first place. Everyone knows the biggest customer for female Viagra is going to be men and that’s not really how it should be. I have a feeling the whole female Viagra thing is a big mistake, but to your question, I think your scenario fits the theory of rape. It may not 100% fit the profile of criminally punishable rape but it’s on the fence leaning the wrong way that’s for damn sure. The problem is you should never be putting anything in anyone’s drink. That’s usually bad no matter what you’re putting in there. The only thing that could save you here is if a woman still maintains her proper judgement on female Viagra. Will women on Viagra run around fucking anything? I doubt it, but that is what every man is hoping for. Now that’s where the confusion comes in because horniness obviously impairs your judgement no matter who you are whether it’s natural or from a pill. This opens up a very complex discussion that I’m not sure anyone has a proper understanding of. You start having to weigh out free will versus brain chemistry and hormones. Ultimately, I think this is a question for the courts to answer. My best advice is to not offer female Viagras to anyone in a bar or club setting because mixing alcohol with female Viagra is said to cause fainting and that would definitely be rape.

Female Viagra isn't supposed to be for date rape, it's supposed to be for something pure and beautiful, like allowing this woman to fuck despite all of nature's obstacles.

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