Dumbass Sayings: “I’ll Stop The World and Melt with You”

Sometimes you’ll be riding in a ferris wheel with some lady you met on the BigfootBelieversMeet dating network and she says “I’ll stop the world and melt with you!” Now this is clearly taken from the song “I Melt With You” by the English band Modern English. In the context of that specific song it makes sense, but this does not make sense as something to say to another human being in any other scenario. Telling someone “I’ll stop the world” is not very comforting. That almost sounds like a threat. It sounds like something a madman would say before they detonated a hydrogen bomb. Don’t STOP the world. The world can keep going. Why does the world need to come to a halt for love to be experienced? Let people live their lives for chrissake. It would be painfully selfish to freeze the entire world. How about just stop the immediate area? A one mile radius around you would be sufficient. People in Madagascar don’t need to stop for you. And why melt? Yeah let’s go lower ourselves by a chain into a vat of molten metal like the Arnold Schwarzenegger in “Terminator 2: Judgement Day.” That sounds like a lot of fun! Fuck that. Keep the world spinning and let’s remain in solid flesh form, psycho.

This only makes sense if a steel mill worker is saying this to another steel mill worker.