Dumbass Sayings “Pissed Off”

When people get really angry they say they’re “Pissed off.” For some reason we just accept this to mean angry and don’t really think anymore about it. What does it mean to be “Pissed off” exactly? To me, being pissed off means being so angry that your rage is powerful enough to involuntarily force the urine out of your bladder. That’s how you know someone’s really mad. You might think someone is a little irritated by you, but if they’re literally pissing on themselves you know their anger is driving them to pure madness. Yet who actually does that? When was the last time you saw someone pee in their pants out of rage? If you actually do angrily piss yourself then that would speak for itself. You wouldn’t need a term for that like being “pissed off.” That would be for someone else to say, which of course would only make you angrier at which point you might then become “Shitted off”.

"Here are our urine jugs!"
"Just put them on the table, freaks."

2012 Presidential Election Nightmare Scenario

With all the talk about voter fraud, voting machine manipulation, and disputed ballots, this may be one of the most nightmarish elections America has ever seen. Sadly there's nothing we as citizens can do to prevent a nationwide election nightmare situation, but there are things we can do to prevent personal election nightmare situations.

Anyone who's ever had to stand on line for a long time knows you usually have to piss or shit. Peeing on yourself while standing in line waiting to vote is a very real danger that can threaten your voting experience. Please make sure to limit fluid intake if you are in a district that sees a high voter turnout and long lines. If you are in such a district make sure to empty your bladder and bowels within fifteen minutes of getting into line. Trust me, you do NOT want to be the guy or gal who ends up peeing all over themselves and having to continue standing in line waiting with everyone staring at you, especially if you have an STD that makes your urine smell particularly putrid.

Worst case scenario if you feel this urge to pee or poop while standing on line try your best to hold on til you can get in a booth and just do your business there.