Dumbass Sayings: “It Was Their Time”

When someone dies the friend and loved ones always say something like “It was their time. God decided he couldn’t wait any longer to have them with him in his kingdom of Heaven!” That’s a nice sentiment, but I’m not sure that’s how it works. In the grand scheme of eternity I doubt God is up there getting antsy about days, weeks, months, years, decades, centuries, or even millennia. Why would God be impatient about such matters? Like God is up there going “Oh ME, I don’t know who to take up to Heaven today! Who deserves it now and who can wait a little while longer? Hmm let’s see...” This would mean that every elderly person in the world is being avoided by God. God is doing the heavenly equivalent of blocking them on social media. He doesn’t want to hear or see them, they can stay down there on Earth and rot for a couple more decades. THEN finally, at age 110 God will decide it’s their time and he’s finally ready to bring them in. That seems weird. I mean the lord does work in mysterious ways, but that’s a little ridiculous. And what about dying babies? Wouldn’t God want to give them at least a couple of years? Talk about jumping the gun! I guess God loves having babies around. Thank Him, he doesn’t love babies too much because a Heaven where God is just swimming in babies would mean a very horrific Earth where babies are constantly dying left and right. I guess babies are a rare indulgence for the almighty like sneaking a chocolate here and there.

Looks like it was their time, a long time ago.