The Top 5 Worst Karaoke Songs To Sing

Amazing how something so
small can make you look
 like such a big jackass.

Karaoke can be a lot of fun when you choose the right songs to sing. You need to pick good songs that people can groove to, but you also need to pick songs that are within your vocal range. If you’re drunk enough, none of that really matters, however, there are still those songs that bring the mood down in a room no matter how close to alcohol poisoning you are. Here are the top 5 worst songs to sing on karaoke night:

5. “The Star-Spangled Banner” by Francis Scott Key

Obviously the song is great, but I would only recommend you singing it at karaoke night if you’re sure of your vocal skills. This song destroys talented singers all the time so you’re going to want to proceed with caution. Plus, it’s the national anthem of America so the last thing you want to do is butcher it while you’re shitfaced like Roseanne did.

4. ”Hallelujah Chorus” from “Messiah” by Handel

This is a song that requires a lot of help from other people to do it justice. If you don’t have at least three other people singing with you it won’t sound good and you’ll feel like a huge ass. If you do choose “Hallelujah” make sure everyone is completely wasted.

3. “Scary Monsters and Nice Sprites” by Skrillex

It’s really hard to sing Dubstep songs. This one is particularly difficult because of the weird voices and all the Transformer sex noises. A lot of times people will assume you’re having a stroke and end up calling an ambulance.

2. “Amazing Grace” by John Newton

When you pick a song for karaoke it should be something fun and happy. Singing “Amazing Grace” really kills a party and makes people think about their lost loved ones. It can be a beautiful moment, but that’s not really what people go to karaoke for.

And the number one worst song to sing on karaoke night is…

1. “Star Wars Theme - Main Title” by John Williams

A lot of people tend to get creeped out when you start singing along to songs that don’t have lyrics. And while being a “nerd” is considered cooler these days than it used to be, singing the Star Wars theme won’t do you any favors when it comes to getting laid.

Now you might be thinking “Hey, I’m a great singer! I can make those songs work!” Well please be my guest. Give it a shot and see if you have any different results than I had. All I can do is give you my expertise and I’m saying these songs ruined parties. If you think you have what it takes please record it and send me a link. I’m sure we’d all love to see it.

Dumbass Sayings: “Party Pooper”

Sorry, guys.

What does it mean to be a party pooper? Apparently it means someone who brings down a party’s mood or even ruins a party. So why is that linked to the word “poop”? What are we children? The way I see it, if someone poops at your party that means your party is "the shit"! If you haven't been paying attention to modern terminology that means "good".

Pooping is a natural human thing to do. People poop. Sometimes people have to poop at parties. And yes sometimes some people poop way more than other “normal” people and make the whole house stink to high heaven. Should I be ashamed of that? No. Look, I’m sorry I “ruined” your party, but if you’re that frightened of the natural smells of human feces then I suggest you have an air vent in your bathroom above the toilet or some scented candles I could have lit up to help minimize the smell. Oh and Happy 6th Birthday, Jimmy.