Dumbass Sayings: “Life is a Race”

Life isn't a race because I
don't see race. And I see life.
So how can life be race?

A lot of people these days like to think that life is a race. You’ve seen these people on the highways driving to work going 90 MPH. Some people are always in a hurry because they think life is just one big race against the clock. What they don’t get is that life couldn’t be farther from a race. If life was a race then fat people would be losing. Fat people are awful at races, but as it is, being fat doesn’t mean you’re going to have a bad life. Lots of above average mass individuals are out there living very fulfilling existences. If life was a race then African people would probably be kicking ass. As it is, a lot of African people are starving and living in drought conditions. If life was a race, the doctor would shoot a starting pistol the second you emerged from your mother’s vagina. And if life was a race we’d all be wearing short shorts and drinking way too much Gatorade. But life clearly is not a race.