Dumbass Sayings: “Ladies First”

Just the other day I was walking into a building and some guy held the door open for me and said “Ladies first!” I had a problem with this. The problem wasn’t that he guessed my gender wrong, in case you were wondering. Why the hell would I be offended if someone thought I was a woman? Is it a shameful thing to be a woman? Are women inferior to men or something? The way most men get offended when you think they’re a woman you might assume such a thing. That’s ridiculous. I don’t feel complimented if someone thinks I’m a woman either, I feel nothing because I believe in equality and therein lies my real problem with someone saying “Ladies first.” It’s 2014 and we should all be working toward achieving true equality in all forms including gender. With that in mind, “Ladies first” is some sexist ass bullshit. Women can talk all they want about equality, but if they still take advantage of the archaic gender bias of “Ladies first” then they’re being immense hypocrites. If you’re a woman and some guy holds a door open for you and says “Ladies first” you should look him dead in the eyes and say “Go on ahead, jerkwad. Ladies and gentlemen are equal. If you get to the door first, just walk through the damn thing and move on with your life. It’s a door, you’re not doing me a favor. I’m not a mentally disabled baby with primordial dwarfism, I can open a goddamn door for myself.”

This is the 21st century, you've gotta earn your helmets, ladies. Enough of this free shit.