Dumbass Sayings: “Dickless Turd”

Sometimes people are like “You’re officially out of this family! Now pack your shit and get the hell out, you dickless turd!” Dickless turd? Is there any other kind? Would it be any better to be a dicked turd? I’d find that to be highly disturbing. Have you ever seen a turd with a dick in it? Outside of anal porn? Of course turds don’t have dicks. They’re not supposed to have dicks. The only time a turd would have a dick is if it was one of those sticky poops and a tiny bit happened to break off a little and was hanging off the main body of the turd so that it sort of looked like a makeshift shit pecker. Still, why is that any worse than being a normal run of the mill turd? If you’re going to compare people to bowel movements it would be much more painful to call someone loose runny shit. That would at least mean they have no integrity and are slimy. Those are negative adjectives that actually make sense as a put down. Calling someone a “dickless turd” is like calling someone a “broke hobo.” There’s no point in that. The adjective is inherent in the meaning and nature of the noun. You’re overstating the obvious and it’s making YOU look like the turd, nana!

If you ever see free grey puffed Cheetos, stay away. It's usually deer shit.