Dumbass Sayings: “Stand Down”

Sometimes when you’re held hostage in a bank robbery the robbers will barricade the entrance. When the cops attempt to enter to rescue everyone, a robber will grab you by the neck and press you up against the front window with a gun to your head and screams “I’LL DO IT! I’LL FREAKING DOO ITTTT!” When this happens you’ll usually hear one of the cops yell to his squadron “STAND DOWN! STAND DOWN!” All you can think when you hear this is “Really?” Stand down? What the hell is that supposed to mean? You mean “SIT”? I think that’s what they mean to say, after all “sit” is an order. The reason they probably don’t use it is because it’s an order people yell at dogs and they don’t want to be compared or seen as dogs. It’s a shame because “sit” is obviously a syllable shorter than “stand down” so it would be quicker to say and in high stakes, high pressure situations like a hostage about to be killed, brevity in command would probably behoove us all.

Stand down, Mr. T.