7.06.2009

Would this have been a better way to handle the Jacko memorial lottery?

I have to say on behalf of all Michael Jackson fans, (even though I'm not really one, though how can you not be to a slight degree?) that this lottery for who gets to go to the Michael Jackson memorial service is horse feces. Right now you've got tons of people who've never even heard "Thriller" unfairly winning the right to mourn Jackson. That right should belong to a true hardcore fan; the kind of fan that would have still supported Jackson even if he had been found guilty of child molestation. Now these tickets are ending up on eBay and true fans are being taken advantage of.

What they should have done was prolong this a little longer (which is what they're probably going to do anyway) and start a network talent show where millions of Jackson fans battle in physical challenges to win memorial tickets.

The preliminary group would first run through a giant obstacle course all dressed like Michael Jackson at various stages of his career. The first hundred to finish would then move onto the talent portion and do a song and dance where we at home will get to laugh at losers like in "American Idol." Then eventually we take the dozen or fewer talented people who are professional, rabid, Michael Jackson impersonators and force them to fight each other while trapped in a 30 foot tall barbed wire cage. The last person alive gets all the memorial tickets and then the losers have a final chance to tear him apart and whoever can get tickets, gets them. Yes I did just assume a man would win that contest... But if I had said "them" that would have confused the last word in the sentence "them" meaning the tickets with the ticket winner. And I can't call the winner "it" that's just insulting...

Now think of how entertaining that would be! They really lost a great opportunity here.

-Binkie McFartnuggets

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