Ask McFartnuggets: “Why Does Carefree Make Tampons and Sugarless Gum?”

Dear McFartnuggets: Have you noticed that the company Carefree makes sugarless chewing gum AND tampons? What the hell is that? -- Irene from Tempe, Arizona

Dear Irene:

After doing a little research I discovered that Carefree pantiliners were created in the 1970’s and the Hershey Corporation actually makes Carefree sugarless chewing gum so it’s two different companies. That being said I don’t know why Hershey’s chose the name Carefree. I don’t know why you would want to link gum with periods. If anything, they should have bought out the Carefree pantiliner folks and made a brand of chocolate to be sold with their maxi pads and tampons since women love chocolate so much.

Another strange fact is that the Energizer company owns the Carefree tampon makers. It’s surprising they don’t bring that up more often in advertisements. Who wouldn’t want to buy tampons that can handle periods that keep going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going...

Send questions to PizzaTesticles@yahoo.com