12.03.2014

Ask McFartnuggets: “If Apple Products Are So Good Why Are They Always Updating Them?”

Introducing the new iPod
Plus, now with CT Scan
capability!
Dear McFartnuggets: 
People who use Apple products claim they’re the best because they’re so easy to use and ergonomic and perfect, but if that’s the case why are they always coming out with new ones? Like I understand that you have to progress all the time in business, but people talk about Apple like they’re God and God shouldn’t have to work on improving himself. They’re always coming out with new iPhones that people absolutely have to buy. They’re always coming out with new different sizes of iPads. If their products were so good wouldn’t one be good enough for at least two years? Why would they always keep changing things around? They’re actually coming out with an iPad Air PLUS. So an iPad Air is thinner and lighter than a normal iPad, but that’s not good enough for people so they’re going to make it bigger and make an iPad Aid Plus which may as well be just a normal iPad. Why do these idiots just keep buying this stuff even though it’s basically all the same? -- Stephanie from Baltimore, Maryland

Dear Stephanie:
All the Apple products might seem a little ridiculous, but you have to remember that technology is always making new things possible. Maybe the ideal tablet is the size of a newspaper and just as thin, but right now current technology isn’t able to provide that so they have to incrementally release products that inch closer and closer to that. Maybe in a more sensible world they’d take more time to make greater more efficient leaps in the different models, but since people are willing to pay thousands of dollars for the same thing just a couple centimeters bigger or smaller then it makes business sense to take advantage of that. That’s why you see people with a shopping cart that contains an Apple Watch, an Apple Watch Plus, an iPhone Plus, an iPhone Air, an iPod with added phone capability, an iPhone Nano, and an iPad Air Plus Minus Jumbo Lite. It’s like Mexican food. It’s all just chicken, beef, and pork on a tortilla, but you can arrange that a million different ways all with different names and people will still love it.


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