1.03.2015

Dumbass Sayings: "Eat Lightning and Crap Thunder"

There's a famous line from the movie "Rocky" where Rocky's trainer says Rocky is going to eat lightning and crap thunder. You can't crap thunder. Thunder is a sound You can FART thunder, but those must have been some really bad eggs. Do you have any idea how fast feces would have to be propelled from your asshole to hear a thunderclap? The speed of sound, sucker. You can't eat lightning either for that matter. Lightning is made of electricity so there's no way to digest that. Maybe it'd be possible to eat spoiled seafood and have something akin to a tsunami come out of your ass, but that's as far as I'd go with the natural disaster defecation metaphors. If it was actually possible to eat lightning and crap thunder then whoever could would be considered a god and placed up on tall buildings to protect cities from lightning strikes. Sadly, there have been no documented cases of such thunderous excretions.

Good luck eating that. That's like getting a facial from god.

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