By now everyone knows there’s more to arm wrestling than just brute strength. There are special techniques that can help you defeat someone bigger and stronger in a battle of arms. Here are the top 5 tricks you can employ to help win at arm wrestling: (Keep in mind that using these tactics in professional contests may get your disqualified and using them in bars may get you murdered. They’re intended more for casual contests where no money is being wagered.)
5. Tickle your opponent
The next time you feel that your opponent is stronger than you, use your free left hand to tickle them under the armpit. Generally this will stun them long enough to get the win. This works better on women than men as they may take it as flirting. That doesn't really make sense, but I guess losing makes people poor sports.
Never tickle a dead baby. |
4. Cough
Coughing directly into your opponent’s face is a very effective tactic especially if you have some sort of airborne illness. At worst you’ll startle them, at best you’ll give them the flu which may cause crucial fatigue as soon as symptoms arise.
Forget an atom bomb they could have just had this guy cough on Japan. |
3. Go “Over the top”
If you’re ever losing in arm wrestling you can always go “Over the top” which is a technique seen in the classic 1987 Sylvester Stallone film “Over the Top.” This is a very confusing and difficult to master skill, but apparently the way it works is just before your arm slams the table you release the pressure of the other person’s arm and then use that energy to push it “over the top” while screaming.
Someone went "Over the top" on this guy and now he has to keep his arm in a giant dildo box. |
2. Lick your hand
Licking your hand the second before you grab the other person’s hand can be a very powerful arm wrestling trick. Most people get really grossed out by this especially if you tell them you have Ebola or actually do have Ebola.
It helps if you have some sort of oral infection. |
And the number one most useful trick to help you win at arm wrestling is...
1. Reveal your hand herpes
This is a tough one because first you need to have herpes on your hand. Basically herpes can attach itself to pretty much anywhere on the body. Once you have the hand herpes you can cover up the sores with makeup or gloves. Then right before the arm wrestling match, let your opponent see the blisters and they will usually forfeit the match.
Hand Herpes doesn't get much press, but it's a real problem that affects hundreds. |
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