Ask McFartnuggets: “Why Do Airplanes Really Have Oxygen Masks Drop From The Ceiling?”

Dear McFartnuggets: 

I read that airplanes have those oxygen masks that drop from the ceiling because if they didn’t people would lose oxygen and lose consciousness. What I wanna ask is why is that such a bad thing? If my plane is crashing I think that’s a moment I’d like to be unconscious for. Why would anyone want to be lucid and aware the moment they smash into the ground or an ocean? There was that myth in “Fight Club” that the masks get people high well that’s completely unnecessary because being unconscious is doing one better than being high so why do they really have the oxygen masks? Shouldn’t they do away with them entirely? -- Katelynn from Alexandria, Virginia

Dear Katelynn:

What you’re referring to is altitude sickness and hypoxia which take effect when there’s a loss in cabin pressure. Obviously it’s not safe to just be unconscious from a lack of oxygen. There can be some serious complications if you survive the ordeal. The nice thing about the masks is they’re optional. They don’t deploy from the ceiling and wrap themselves around your head like facehuggers from the “Alien” movies. If that were the case then I could see your point about not having them there. However, they are optional so it’s really up to you if you want to risk potential brain damage in the event you survive or if you’d like to just pass out and enter the eternal slumber of death prematurely to avoid the tremendous pain of a fatal impact. It’s the ultimate gamble.

If you're going really fast over land it's probably best to lose consciousness.

Write your questions to PizzaTesticles@yahoo.com