Dumbass Sayings: “Beat Around The Bush”

When you’re a kid and you’re trying to explain to your parents in a delicate way that you lost your younger brother in a woods at night and you think he may have fallen into a pit of some sort they say “Out with it, boy! Stop beating around the bush!” At the time you have no idea what that really means, you only understand what it’s meant to communicate. You think “Oh they want me to stop stalling.” It’s only when you get older when you realize what a vulgar statement it is. The idea that any adult would use this phrase around a child is just despicable. Of course when you get older you realize that “beating around the bush” is a metaphor for masturbating around a woman’s pubic hair when you should just be having sex already. It’s an obvious combination of the slang phrase for masturbating: “Beating your meat” and the slang for a pubic hair: “bush.” What else could that possibly mean? Of course if you’re old enough to understand it, the saying does make perfect sense. What’s puzzling is, who was the first guy to beat around a bush? What possessed them to turn this into a popular phrase? It’s ridiculous how immature some people were back then.

You didn't think they were talking about this did you?