Five Easy Ways To Get Get Rid of and Prevent Ass Pimples

If you’re like me then you know nothing ruins a vacation, family BBQ, or wedding quite like having lots of ass pimples. Ass acne or “Assne” as it’s referred to in the medical community, is a pesky problem that can escalate into a serious quality of life altering malady. It’s important to get a stranglehold on your Assne early on and take preventative measures to avoid an untimely outbreak. Here are five easy tips you can use to help treat your butt pimples and prevent them from reappearing in the future:

1. Wear loose pants with a tight belt

Wearing loose pants allows ass sweat to evaporate instead of press right against the skin’s asspores. Wearing a tight belt will keep your back and head sweat from rolling down into the crack of your ass.

It's best to wear pants made of cheesecloth to maximize aeration.

2. Apply talcum powder to your buttcheeks.

Talcum powder helps absorb moisture and keeps your buttocks fresh and dry. A dry ass is a healthy ass.

This is one positive use for fake cocaine you got suckered into buying again.

3. Use Stridex pads on your ass.

They’re not just for teenager’s faces anymore. The acid in Stridex can be very helpful in cleaning buttpores and preventing future breakouts.

They're not just for cleaning the clown makeup off your face!

4. Use a daily cleansing/exfoliating wash.

Sometimes the best thing to do about assne is to get proactive. I don’t specifically mean Proactive like from the commercials, but considering it shares the same three letters as prostate it might not be such a bad fit for treating anal pimples.

Your ass is just a face with no eyes or nose that you sit on.

5. Change your underpants frequently.

Some people think you should only change your underpants every few days or after you shart, but underpants should be changed rather frequently. If you’re experiencing strong assne it’s recommended that you change your underpants up to three times a day to keep everything fresh.

It also helps if you wear baggy underpants. Not to attractive, but then again neither is assne.

So there you have it, try my five methods and if you don’t start to see your ass pimples diminish after about a week then there’s a good chance you have some sort of STD!