Dumbass Sayings: “Cat Got Your Tongue?”

Sometimes when your wife asks you to explain the dead Guatemalan migrant worker in your basement and you remain silent while struggling to think of a good excuse she’ll say “What’s the matter, cat got your tongue?” This is a completely bizarre saying that I can’t believe still persists. Do people even stop to think about what this means? The origins of this saying are unknown, but I think it’s pretty obvious where this came from. Clearly someone was making out with their cat and the cat bit their tongue off. They had to go to the hospital to be treated, a portion of their tongue had to be amputated to prevent infection and from that day on he couldn’t speak properly. That’s a horrible story and I don’t know why anyone would want to conjure that thought up. Let us bury that moment in time forever and never speak of it again. While the man is likely long dead, his descendants are probably still tortured and ashamed anytime they hear this. Yes, it does provide a bit of a warning to people who are thinking about French kissing their cat, but really, who needs a warning about that? If they’re gonna do it they’re gonna do it. I wish there was a way to stop them, but hey, if the cat isn’t having fun it can always “get their tongue.”

This cat will take more than your tongue if you try that shit.