Craigslist has to be one of the best things technology has given us in the past fourteen years, (not considering all the murders and rapings it's led to.) I suggest devoting some time to check out craig'slist's job section for hilarious comedy that will almost make you forget you're eating spagettios for dinner tonight.
I'm not going to include any details about these jobs, but if you are interested in any of them please reconsider your life's course right now and fix the situation before it's too late.
Your daily activities include, but are certainly not limited to, greeting customers with a smile and confidence; running up and down stairs; feeding according to instructions; supervising group play; walking dogs; cleaning up poop and pee; CLEANING; playing with the dogs; helping around the store when needed; being organized. This is a very fun position with a great group of dogs, each with their own personality.
Serious applicants MUST be slim and fit, comfortable with their bodies ( i.e. sunbathing topless is not a big deal), and extremely attractive. Experience in the healing arts or sensual work is not required. Foreign applicants are welcome.
To get this job you must be very attractive, have pretty feet, be open minded about fetishes and fantasies, adventurous, and enjoy parties and being fun and social. You also must be punctual and responsible at the same time.
We are hiring asap so apply now if you feel you qualify please
send ALL THREE of the following....
1. Your Name
2. Your Number
3. A Recent Photo
We won't take some tardy pretty footed bitch, and we won't be fooled by another 70 year old woman that used to have nice feet.
We are currently looking for healthy, normal weight men and women, age 30-45, to participate in a sleep study. This is a 2-phase, inpatient study. You must be willing to stay at the research center for 2 periods of 6 consecutive days to participate and must regularly sleep at least 7-9 hours/night ignoring strange feelings around your hoo-hoo.
I really hope none of those are real jobs, but then again that means that whoever shows up for an interview will probably be lured into an abandoned factory and beaten over the head with a crowbar, so actually I do hope they are real jobs...