Classic Dream Interpretations: The Naked Dream

Am I the only one who dreams about
being naked with pizza dough on my face?

We’ve all had that dream where we show up to work naked. In the dream everyone is staring at us and we’re really scared and want to run away. Then we bend over and shoot fire out of our ass lighting the entire place ablaze using our butthole like the nozzle of a flamethrower. It’s a scary dream, sometimes it’s exciting. Sometimes you wake up after this dream and find you’ve had a bit of an accident, right? What does this dream mean?

Classic dream interpreters say this dream means you’re afraid of being exposed for something that you’re hiding from people. I say it means you need to stop having Taco Bell and Whiskey for lunch. You’re afraid of what the alcohol can do to your mind and what it can make you capable of. Will it make you show up bareassed naked one day? It’s certainly possible. This dream is your subconscious mind’s warning to yourself to change your behaviors. Also, no human being should be eating Taco Bell for lunch. Eat it for dinner when you’ve got nothing to lose, unless you have a habit of shitting the bed. Don’t risk having an ass inferno at work or on the bus ride home.