Dumbass Sayings: “At Least You Still Have Your Health”

When your wife leaves you and takes the kids and moves to Montana someone always tries to cheer you up by saying “Hey at least you still have your health!” This is such a bullshit way to try and cheer someone up. First of all, it never works. It never works! Why do people say it? Who has something terrible happen in their personal life, hears “Well you still have your health!” and goes “You know what? You’re right! I don’t know why I was worried about losing my job! I’m still healthy. That’s obviously the only thing that matters in life!” It’s extremely rare for this phrase to make anyone truly feel better. On top of that, you better not say it around someone who has cancer or something. Not only are you not helping the person you’re trying to cheer up, but you’re also making someone who doesn’t have their health feel even more like shit. If you’re going to say this, make sure you and the other person are in private and not in a hospital waiting room for example. Also be very sure you know the health status of the person you’re talking to. Imagine how destroyed a person would feel if you said that a day they found out they have Legionnaire’s Disease. The last thing is, when something really depressing happens that can often lead to physical health issues. If you’re really distraught enough about something then you might not have your health for long. Bottom line, just never say this to anyone.

If health was that valuable no one would ever sell a kidney.

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