There’s a song by some musician named Ryan Cabrera called “House On Fire” and the chorus goes “We can burn hotter than a house on fire.” This is pretty offensive to anyone who’s lost everything they’ve had in a housefire. Who the hell is this Ryan Cabrera guy to be singing songs like this? Do you have any idea how painful this must be for someone who’s had their home burn down in a tragic accident? You’re listening to a song dancing trying to have a good time then you hear “We can burn hotter than a house on fire!” and immediately you have flashbacks of your Christmas tree catching a spark from the outlet and seeing all your presents and stockings set ablaze as your parents scream “GET OUT NOW!” You all get out onto the front lawn and your mother hugs you as hard as she ever has. Your sister screams “Mittens is still in there!” She runs back into the house after her cat and you shout “SARAH, NO!” You run back in there after her. It feels ten times hotter than the oven was when you snuck a peek of the Christmas ham earlier that day. You look to your left and the living room is on fire, you look right and your dining room is on fire. The stairs are clear of fire so you run up to the top. Your sister is collapsed on the floor. You try to shake her and wake her up “SARAH! GET UP!” You hear the ceiling creaking and the fire is getting even hotter. Then a part of the roof collapses on your head and everything goes black. When you wake up you’re in a hospital bed and your parents tell you Sarah didn’t make it, nor did Mittens. Yeah… That’s really something I want to relive when I hear this dipshit’s horsecrap song about burning hotter than a house on fire. You’re trying to tell me we’re going to burn hotter than THAT? NO THANKS, asswipe.
|Yeah let me burn hotter than a family's broken dreams. That sounds fun.|