6.20.2015

Dumbass Sayings: “Make Ends Meet”

Sometimes when you meet up with an ex they tell you about how awful things have been going for them since you broke up. They say shit like “It’s terrible. My world has been destroyed. I ended up losing my job and now I’m struggling to make ends meet!” Pardon me, but what ends are you attempting to make meet exactly? Ends to what? And why must they meet? So let me get this straight, when people have a lot of money then the ends are met? What does that even mean? The only way this saying makes sense is if you’re paying hookers to rub their butts together or something. Then you’ve got enough money to make ends meet. Maybe you’re saving up for some crazy German science experiment where you’re planning to stitch two people’s assholes together to see what happens when you keep feeding them the same exact amounts of food. I’d sincerely hope that’s not what your plan is, but at least that would correlate with what you’re saying. Unless you’re doing these odd things, I have no idea what the hell you’re talking about and you need to stop saying things that don’t make sense. How’s this for an idea? Only say things you understand thoroughly. Maybe this is the reason you lost your job. You keep saying shit you don’t even know about.

People who have the spare time to do jigsaw puzzles are usually pretty good at making ends meet.

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