Dumbass Sayings: “Night Owl”

When someone lives the majority of their life at night people call them “Night owls.” This is a little redundant. Are there day owls? Obviously any owl would be a night owl. That’s like calling someone a “Day chicken.” Chickens are out and about during the day so you don’t need to mention the obvious. And why owl? Well they have to use a bird because “night owls” are supposed to be the opposite of “early birds.” The problem is there really are no “early birds.” Who do you know considers themselves to be an “early bird.” No one really likes to wake up early so much so that it defines their personality, not the same way there are people who stay up late all the time. So staying up late really isn’t anything special, it shouldn’t require a special name. The other thing is, owls are wise. Usually “Night owls” are out doing MDMA at dance clubs at 2 am. That’s not wise behavior. Why not just call them “Nightingales”? That’s a nocturnal bird and you’ve got the word night built right in so you’re not adding extra words. Plus with “Hunger Games” being so popular these days I’m sure lots of people would want to be called “Nightingales.” That sounds sort of like being a “Mockingjay” who wouldn’t want that? It’s obviously better than being called a damn “Night owl” which is basically like being called a “Night moon.”

People who only go out at night tend to be creepy predators so at least that part of it makes sense.