The Top 5 Benefits To Having A Phablet

Phablets are the cutting
edge of telephonic
technology.

These days phablet (phone tablet computers) are the hottest must have technological item. To some people it might seem ridiculous to carry around a phone the size of an Amazon Kindle, but there are some key benefits to using a gigantic phone. Here are the top 5 benefits to having a phablet:

5. They’re harder to lose.

Losing your phone can be one of the most frightening and crippling moments in a person’s life. Well it’s not news that the bigger something is, the harder it is to lose. If you’re carrying around a phone the size of a VHS tape you’ll notice if you’ve left it behind because you’ll feel a great absence on your person.

4. They’re harder to steal.

Phone theft is a widespread problem these days, but with more and more phablets out there this should be less of a problem. If someone grabs your phablet to steal it they then have to run with it and that’s going to hinder anyone’s gait. This makes the thief much easier to chase down because they’re basically running with a goddamn toaster.

3. They keep people from sexually harassing you.

If you keep a phablet in your back pocket then the next time someone goes to slap your ass they’re just going to hit aluminum. Your entire asscheek, maybe even part of the other one will be shielded perfectly.

2. In an emergency they can be used as a weapon.

Another key benefit to having a phablet is you can use it as a striking weapon. If you’ve ever attacked someone with an iPhone 4 you know it’s not a great weapon. But try a Samsung Galaxy Note. It’s basically one step below hitting someone with a steel folding chair.

And the number one benefit to having a phablet is...

1. They’re harder to accidentally drop in the toilet.

One of the biggest problems with phones is you always end up dropping them in a toilet. The phone gets pee and crap all over it and clogs up the charger port. You have to put it in a bag of rice for a week and even then it still probably won’t work right and now you’ve got a bag of shitty toilet water rice. Well with a phablet, they’re so damn big you can drop them directly over the toilet and there’s a good chance it won’t even fit through the seat. As phablets get bigger and bigger, it will one day be literally impossible to drop a phone in the toilet. It’ll just get wedged in the seat opening and you can take it out easily. Crisis averted!

Yeah that's not gonna fit.