Dumbass Sayings: “Suicides”

A common sports exercise is running “suicides.” This is an exercise drill where you you a quarter the length of a sports field or court, touch the ground then run back, run half the distance, touch the ground then run back, run three-quarters of the distance touch the ground and run back then run the entire distance touch the ground and run back. The exercise itself is very effective, but the name is what should bother people. In today’s age of depression, it’s a little insensitive to call this drill “Suicides” especially when a high school student participating in this drill may have recently had one of his loved ones or close friends take their own life. You’re trying to prepare for the big game on Sunday and even doing a little running exercise is reminding you of how your friend died during autoerotic asphyxiation. Is it technically suicide or just a mistake? Who cares! You’re still thinking about it. Everyone at school is calling it a suicide and now you’re running suicides. Can’t they call it something else like “Runny back and forthies” or some stupid shit? Why do they have to get so grim with the exercise names? Why not just call another running exercise “Abortions” or “Infanticide”? I guess THAT would be inappropriate. Is that where we’re drawing the line on this?

If someone talks about running suicides, make sure to get them help, as this is a cry for help.

No comments :

Post a Comment