Dumbass Sayings: “Hope and Pray”

Sometimes people say things like “I hope and pray you get your shit together one day because the way you’re living is just sad.” Hope and pray? That’s a little redundant don’t you think? Those two actions are technically the same thing. Praying is hoping to god or some other deity that something will happen. Praying is hoping. That’s like saying “Moving and walking” or “Sensing and smelling.” It just sounds stupid. Now if you’ll excuse me I’m gonna go take and drop a big and huge poop and crap while I hope and pray the burritos and enchiladas I just swallowed and ate don’t burn and singe my butthole and anus shut and closed when they shoot and spray into the toilet and crapper. You see how that sentence was twice as long as it had to be? That’s what happens when you say “hope and pray.”

"Dear god give me the strength to finish crocheting this tube sock."

No comments :

Post a Comment