4.12.2015

The Top 5 Worst Super Heroes to Be Compared To In Bed

It’s nearly every man’s dream to be a superhero at one point or another. One of the main times you want to be compared to a superhero is in bed.  Generally speaking when a woman likens you to the Hulk, Thor, Superman, or Wolverine that’s considered a good thing. However, there are certain superheroes you never want to be compared to sexually and here are the top 5:


5. Banshee
Banshee was a member of the X-Men with the mutant power of super loud sonic screams. Most people get really creeped out when they hear and see a man scream during sex. Men don’t mind if a woman screams during sex (if it’s a good scream) but that’s just another one of those double standards.


4. Multiple Man
If a woman is comparing you to Multiple Man, (a member of X-Factor who can create duplicates of himself at will) then it’s likely she’s either extremely drunk or you’re running a train on her, neither are morally ideal situations.


3. The Flash
Everyone knows The Flash is one of the coolest heroes. His one major weakness of course is premature ejaculation. In most situations he’s done before the woman even knows it’s a date.


2. Quicksilver
Being compared to Quicksilver in bed is essentially the same as being called The Flash except it means your pubes are grey.


And the number one superhero you never want to be compared to in the bedroom is…


1. Ant-Man
Obviously Ant-Man is never a good comic book character to be compared to in the realm of sexual prowess. Unless you can shrink the size of an ant and enter a woman’s vagina, even then, what are you going to do, drown in the acid?

It's like the cartoon vagina is coming right at me!

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