Ask McFartnuggets “Should We Get Our Baby Girl Circumcised?”

I really hope you're joking.
Dear McFartnuggets: 
So I’m 5 months pregnant with our first baby girl. My husband and I have already decided on a name, Annabelle, but we haven’t yet decided on whether or not to get her circumcised. I know it’s a big controversy. Some people don’t like the way it looks, but medical studies say that circumcision lowers the risk of getting STDs including HIV and even some cancers. We’re torn on this and we’d love some help to cut through the bullshit and give us some advice on this. Should we get our daughter circumcised or not? -- Dolly from Salem, Oregon

Dear Dolly:
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAHHHHH!!! You FOOL! Circumcising babies is only for males. Circumcising a female baby is considered “genital mutilation” and is a crime in most of the western world. There are basically no medical benefits to female circumcision and it will basically only ruin your daughter’s life. Don’t do it. Just don’t freaking do it. You got me? DON’T DO IT!

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