Dumbass Sayings: “Rolling Out The Welcome Mat”

When you’re happily welcoming company into your home they say you’re “rolling out the welcome mat” for them. This doesn’t actually make sense. A welcome mat isn’t a sign of actually welcoming someone. A welcome mat might say “Welcome” on it, but that’s really just to make it look nice. The real purpose of a welcome mat is to help keep people’s filthy feet from soiling your carpet and floor. The “Welcome” is just to have something written on the mat to make people ignore the fact that it’s there so they can wipe their disgusting peasant feet off before they step foot inside your holy sanctuary. Obviously welcome mats aren’t meant to be literal, they’re sitting outside your door all damn day. Just because someone sees it doesn’t mean they’re welcomed into your home. It’s a completely pointless and unfaithful sentiment. And no one rolls out welcome mats either. It’s just a mat you throw on the ground. Unless you’re Willy Wonka you’re not rolling a welcome mat out and in that case it’s less of a mat and more of a carpet. This saying simply makes no actual sense.

If you want to keep robbers out just use a magic carpet as a welcome mat.

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