1.10.2013

Things to Move to The Bottom of Your Bucket List

I was just taking a look back at the bucket list that I wrote when I was five and there is a lot of weird stuff on here that in retrospect I don't think I should have added. I won't remove them, but I will definitely place them lower on the list due to how dangerous they are and I suggest you do the same.

-Dress like a dolphin and save a baby from a shark attack.

-Be murdered by an alpaca.

-Headbutt a midget. (I'm waiting to find a midget who actually deserves a headbutt first, I won't headbutt a random midget. So far I have not found a suitable candidate which says a lot for the midget community. Truly awesome people.)

-Slow dance with a crocodile.

-Shit in SOMEONE ELSE's pants for a change, not my own.

-Give a rimjob to an extraterrestrial.

-Live in an elephant's vagina for at least a week.

-Sew a second person to my body to know what it's like to have a conjoined twin.

-Circumcise a polar bear.

- Tickle a lion's nutsack. (I don't know what I was thinking on this one, I had a fascination with lions when I was a kid, but on second thought this doesn't seem like something that should be tackled until your 70's.)

I still do have "Fill my underpants with Eucalyptus leaves and run into a koala enclosure at the zoo" pretty high on my list. So I'm not moving everything down, just the super dangerous stuff that has no logical reasoning behind it.

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