1.24.2013

Dumbass Sayings: "Don't Bring a Knife to a Gun Fight"

I'm sure you've heard the saying "Don't bring a knife to a gun fight". The saying itself makes sense, but how the saying got famous doesn't make sense. I think a better replacement for this saying would be “Bring a bazooka to a gun fight" because there’s a lot of shit you SHOULDN'T bring to a gun fight, why single out knives?

Here are some other things you shouldn’t bring to a gun fight: A bowling pin, birds, umbrella, crazy straws, fetus in a jar, blueprints to a new sports arena, pistachios, the "Friends" DVD box set, Fun Dip, homemade porno, a basket of fresh strawberries, your grandmother’s underpants, a personal enjoyment item, etc. Actually bringing a personal enjoyment item might work as long as you also brought a hobo and a gun so you can shoot the guy while he’s distracted by a hobo waving a personal enjoyment item around.

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