Ask McFartnuggets: “What The Hell Does ‘Bae’ Mean?”

"Bae: Pig in the City"
Dear McFartnuggets: 
Maybe you can help clear this up. Me and my friend have been arguing over what “Bae” means. My friend says it’s the Danish word for “poop” and I think it means “Before anyone else.” What does this word really mean? -- Paul from Olympia, Washington

Dear Paul:
Here’s the thing, it technically does mean poop, but that’s when it’s written “Bæ” which it almost never is. It could also mean “Before anyone else” except that would make it an acronym which means it should be spelled “BAE” which it almost never is. Also I just don’t think it makes sense for it to mean “Before anyone else.” In the Pharell song “Come Get It Bae” he says “Come get it bae, come get it bae, come get it bae, come get it bae.” Does he mean “Come get it before anyone else”? If that’s what he means then bae should be written B.A.E. But you can’t just invent acronyms like that just to fit easily into songs. That’s a horrible precedent to be setting for songwriters. I’d really like to believe that’s not what “Bae” means. More likely it’s just a lazy slang way of saying “Babe.” I know this because there was a meme called “Bae caught me slipping” where people take selfies of themselves pretending to be sleep to make it look like it was their significant other taking the photo and “slipping” was supposed to mean “sleeping.” “Bae caught me slippin” is supposed to mean “Babe caught me sleeping” not “Before anyone else caught me slipping/sleeping.” That definitely makes no sense. Fact of the matter is, it can mean whatever you want. It’s not even a real word. At least not til Webster’s Dictionary puts it in right beside “Bootylicious” and all the other ridiculous words people are inventing these days.

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