Dumbass Sayings: “Appetizers”

Either you're hungry
or you're not.
In America we call Hors d'oeuvres “Appetizers”, but that name doesn’t really seem to make sense. Hors d’oeuvres are small foods served during a dinner to hold people over until the main course arrives. “Appetizer” implies the food is there to stimulate the urge to eat. Who the hell goes into a restaurant not feeling hungry then eats a loaded potato skin and suddenly has the urge to eat an entire dinner? That shouldn’t happen. That’s not the way the human body works. At least it’s not the way the human body SHOULD work, maybe this is how people are these days. That would explain the growing obesity epidemic. Appetizers are not there to “appetize” they’re there to keep you satiated until the entree comes. If you’re going to call anything an “appetizer” it should be cocaine or weed. And let’s not forget the greatest appetizer of them all, time. Those are real appetizers, not mozzarella sticks.

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