Ask McFartnuggets: "What Should I Do When A Mascot is Blocking My View?"

Apparently being Native
American can substitute for
a plush costume these days.
Dear McFartnuggets: 
I'm at a baseball game right now and we have seats right behind the dugout. I thought they would be great seats except the home team mascot is using the roof of the dugout as his little stage area. He's doing cartwheels and all sorts of crazy antics that are obstructing and distracting my view of the game. Now he's actually just bending over and shaking his giant padded ass in my face.  What should I do about this? -- Sierra from Lakewood

Dear Sierra:
I'm sorry I probably got to this question a little late to help you in your predicament. I've been swamped with questions as of late and I apologize. I just hope you didn't do anything too drastic like push the mascot off the dugout or kick him in his ass. In that situation I would just ask him politely to move. You have to understand that there is actually a human being in that costume and while perhaps mentally unstable, they may still appeal to the wishes of the fans as that is one of their primary objectives as mascots. Thanks for the question, Sierra.

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