7.19.2014

Dumbass Sayings: “Caught with Your Hand in the Cookie Jar”

Or if you're English,
don't get caught with your
hand in the biscuit tin.
When you get arrested by a highway patrolman in your car with a prostitute people at work say you got “Caught with your hand in the cookie jar.” Why is this still a saying? Who keeps their cookies in a jar anymore? And why is it bad to have your hand in a cookie jar? That’s how you remove a cookie. If taking a cookie out of the cookie jar is wrong then why even have a cookie jar to begin with? If cookies are a forbidden thing then have a cookie safe with a lock on it. This saying should be replaced with “Caught with your head in the honey jar” like Winnie the Pooh. Because that’s actually embarrassing and painful. You’re walking around blinded by the darkness of a pot full of “hunnie” while everyone’s laughing at you and you fall on your ass. That’s actually a negative thing. When I have my hand in a jar of cookies and someone walks in I don’t give a damn. Getting caught with a hooker is way more like having your head caught in a jar of honey with your pants down and instead of your head it’s your other head and instead of a jar of honey it’s a syphilis infested baby oven of sadness.

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