2.07.2015

Ask McFartnuggets: "What is the Purpose of That Ball on People's Winter Hats?"

Dear McFartnuggets: 
I keep seeing people with these winter hats that have that cloth ball attached to the top. What the hell is that? What's the point of that exactly? It looks so stupid. People are all walking around like it’s normal. People just walking around like they don’t got a ball on their hat for no goddamn reason. You can’t do that. I can’t just wear a shirt with balls dangling off it and think that it’s okay. People need to start questioning this stuff. What are those balls? What purpose do they serve? Why don’t people care? -- Gerald from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Dear Gerald:
What you're referring to are called “pom poms” and they don’t technically serve any function at all. They’re really just meant to be decorative because fluffy balls look good to some people. A normal beanie hat looked boring to someone a long time ago so they attached a fuzzy sphere to it. Then people saw the guy walking around with a ball on his hat and said “Hey that looks interesting. Can you make me one?” A couple hundred years later people are walking around with balls hanging off their heads. Once Santa Claus caught wind of this and started wearing one it exploded in popularity. There’s no logic behind this. It’s just one of those crazy things people do like wear earrings or ball gags.

Poofy balls also help keep hats from looking too pointy like KKK hoods.

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