Ask McFartnuggets: “Why Are Elderly People Allowed to Drive?”

Dear McFartnuggets: 
My grandpa is 87-years-old and can barely remember his own name, yet he’s still legally allowed to have a driver’s licence and he’s out there on the highway! Sometimes he goes outside without pants on and we have to remind him even when it’s like 20 degrees out! I hope that’s very comforting for people. How he survives on the road is anyone’s guess! I’m very worried for him. I just wish the state would intervene and just tell him he can’t drive. Why won’t they make a law for this? -- Jolene from Kansas City, Missouri

Dear Jolene:
You’re in America, Jolene. People have rights. No one can tell you you’re too old to drive. They can tell you that you’re too young, but that’s different… It’s a little similar, but it’s mostly different. For one, driving a car is like riding a bicycle, a really big bicycle that can kill people, the point is, you never forget. The same way your grandpa can walk outside to the mailbox, he can put on the windshield wipers and execute a three-point turn. Even if he does forget, it’s everyone else’s job to be cautious on the road of the cars around them. A drunk driver speeding like nuts is very dangerous, but an old person going super slow will rarely cause a fatality. You don’t see elderly people speeding that often, their hearts can’t handle the velocity. Our elders generally tread on the safer side of poor driving. Plus, what if they did take away your grandpa’s right to drive? Are you going to drive him around to where he needs to go? Of course not, so what do you expect people to do? Exactly.

Unless your grandpa is really out of it and believes he's a pilgrim, he should be okay to drive.

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