Dumbass Sayings: “Put Your Best Foot Forward”

Who really has a best foot? Why would you put it out? If it’s your best foot you should want to protect it. Putting it forward exposes it to danger. A car could run over it or someone could trip on it. And why would you ever put a foot forward ever? To kick someone? Also, when you have only two of something there shouldn’t be such thing as a “best.” Being the best out of only two options is not a gleaming achievement. I doubt your right foot is ecstatic to be the BEST FOOT. All it had to do was beat the other one. It’s a “better foot” and let’s just leave it at that. What does a foot have to do to be better than the other one anyway? My guess is, if you do have a better foot it’s because the other one is fucked up in some way (crooked toes, birth defect, etc.) That would make that foot the “worse foot” and the other foot would be “best” simply by default. Someone told me to put my best foot forward on a job interview and after about half a minute the interviewer asked me to take my foot out of his face and leave. That turned out to be horrible advice. The next time someone tells you to “Put your best foot forward,” put your worst foot forward into their ass.

Don't put this foot forward.

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