Ask McFartnuggets: "How Can I Take The Best Selfie Possible?"

First off, don't look like
you just took a lot of drugs.
Dear McFartnuggets: 
I love taking selfies of myself but I want to push the boundaries and show people something they've never seen before. Can you please suggest to me some ways I can revolutionize the selfie game forever? -- Patricia from Rhode Island

Dear Patricia:
Have you ever considered giving yourself a colonoscopy and then recording that and posting it to Facebook? Just take a tube with a camera on the end of it and stick it all the way into your digestive tract. When you think about it, if a selfie is a photo of yourself then showing the inside of your colon has to be the ultimate selfie. Sure Katie Couric did something similar on the Today show, but she's a major celebrity. A random person showing a video of them stuffing a camera up their ass would definitely make people stop and appreciate the evolution of the selfie. Good luck!

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