Ask McFartnuggets: “Why Do Football Fans Clap When An Injured Player Gets Carted Off?”

Dear McFartnuggets: 
How come whenever you see a football player get seriously injured and taken off the field on a cart the fans cheer and clap? Now if they were leaving the field under their own power on their feet then I could understand clapping, but if they’re being taken off in a cart usually that’s a bad thing. Why would anyone applaud that? If a player got hit so hard in the head they went into a coma and had to be driven off in a cart unconscious people would still clap. Why do people do this? What is the point of that? -- Nina from Indianapolis

Dear Nina:
Most of the time when a player is being carted off people will clap just because it means their fat ass is being taken off the field so the game can continue. People want to see football, not some guy writhing on the ground holding his ankle screaming “MY CAREER IS DEAD!” That’s a bummer. So when that is taken away on a little pickup truck/golf cart and no one has to see it anymore people will cheer. They’re glad the sadness can be forgotten and the happiness of football is back. That’s really the reason people clap. Otherwise there’s really no point to it. It’s not like if you didn’t clap the player would be offended that he wasn’t being shown proper support. If I was a player I’d prefer people to shut the hell up and be so sad they’re speechless and completely silent. That would adequately reflect the severity of my injury and thus display the respect such a tragedy would deserve. If anything people should be crying not clapping.

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