Dumbass Sayings: “The Clap”

When you go to your doctor complaining about penile discharge he’ll usually say “You have the clap.” What he means to say is you have Gonorrhea, but for some reason Gonorrhea’s nickname is “The clap.” This seems like a horrible nickname considering the last thing you feel like doing is clapping when you find out this news. When you ask the doctor why it’s called that he usually has no answer. When you do a little research you find that no one really knows why it’s called The Clap. Some people say it’s because the guy who discovered it was named Dr. Clap. Some people say it’s because the treatment used to involve “clapping” the penis or slamming a book on it to clear it of pus. I don’t necessarily buy either of those. The only way this nickname makes sense is when you go back to the whore you got it from and she gives you a slow clap like The Joker in the jail cell from “The Dark Knight” and laughs fiendishly at you. That is literally the only way this name makes sense and even then not really. Even if it is true that gonorrhea used to be treated by clapping the penis, that’s still a horrible nickname. You don’t name an infection after the means used to treat it. And women can get gonorrhea too obviously so calling it The Clap really wouldn’t make sense in their case. Even the alternate nickname for gonorrhea “The Drip” sounds stupid. Gonorrhea is a serious problem that can spread to your heart, it should be taken seriously and that would involve not comparing your dick to a leaky faucet. Just call it gonorrhea and leave it at that. There’s no need for cutesy nicknames here.

This is a pretty damn old photo so I don't know how long before Penicillin doctors were "clapping" wangs. It just doesn't make sense.

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